Ch- ch- Changes

Ch-ch-changes / Pretty soon you’re gonna get a little older / Time may change me / But I can’t trace time — David Bowie

Now that our nest is getting closer to empty, I think about stuff:  My purpose; my time; my marriage.  That’s typical.  Okay, don’t forget—I can read your minds: “Now your time is free for ministry!”  … “Get a job; Social Security’s a joke.”  … “Hey: you still have a husband, a daughter, and two elderly ladies to take care of.”  Thank you, Readers; you’re all very helpful, lol.

What’s surprising to me is, Hubby’s thinking, too.   He’s working on relationships.  He’s always been a Social Sam, but with those closest to him, not-so-much.  But it’s improving. With me, however, he seems to struggle.  I am the conundrum of his existence—an enigma.  I don’t blame him (entirely): I, too, am a Friendly Freda, but with Hubby I tend to clam up.  Another reminder that hindsight is 20/20.  Which, added together, is my behind. (Did she actually say that?!)

Well, anyway…  In an attempt to work at a healthy marriage, I made up some cards today.  Enjoy:

LOVE  – Assume he/she means well.  ~  Renew your commitment daily. ~ Respect each other’s privacy. ~ Be empathetic. ~  Be sensitive to his/her moods. ~ Forgive. ~ Go on dates. ~ Morning cuddle. ~ Persevere.

ACTION  – Handle finances together.  ~ Look good.  ~  Obey God’s instructions for your role.  ~  Work on projects together.  ~  Worship God together. ~ Serve the church together.

FUNCelebrate little things.  ~  Email.  ~  5-minute connections.  ~  Little surprises.  ~  Make plans.  ~  Play games.  ~  Rearrange things. ~  Share hospitality.

COMMUNICATION  – Admit fault/take responsibility. ~ Be genuine, humble, and sweet. ~ Be honest and open. ~ Compromise. ~ Do not stay angry for long. ~ Laugh a lot. ~ Listen more. ~ Pick your battles. ~ Respond carefully. ~ Share what you read and learn. ~ Talk more.

PROTECTION  – Do not provoke jealousy. ~ Guard him/her. ~ Help each other be healthy and fit. ~ Honor him/her among others.  ~ Study Scripture and pray together. ~ Trust each other. ~ Deal with sins.

ENCOURAGEMENT  – Ask his/her plans for today.  ~ Ask how it went today. ~ Be interested in his/her interests. ~ Serve (do acts of kindness). ~ Show appreciation.  ~ Support each other (don’t be selfish). ~ Tell what you like about him/her.

So it’s time I stick my neck out a bit—talking more, doing more, and loving more.  Here’s to  Ch-ch-changes!

This entry was posted in Life With Hubby, Relationships and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Ch- ch- Changes

  1. marian says:

    Thanks “Her”! ;D I needed that little reminder. I tend to get cranky sometimes and guess who is at the receiving end most of the time? Him.

    Have a great day implementing your Ch-ch-changes… and say a little prayer for me that I can join you…

    God Bless! ❤ Me

  2. Nicole says:

    Oh honey– those are all good things to remember in a marriage! I hope that by working on those things you will have a happier and better marriage for the years to come.

    So sorry to hear that you clam up around your husband. That’s definitely a cue to read those cards! Your husband should be your best friend- one you’re most comfortable with!

    Hope it all gets better!

    Hugs from a mama in the South!

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