“Would you guys like to do a good deed for an 85-year-old woman?” When they looked at me, they almost dropped their groceries. In that brief moment, I expect they wondered if I had a really expensive plastic surgeon. AWKWARD! I quickly recovered with, “Will you please reach that cereal? It’s the only kind my mother-in-law can eat.” One of them, speechless, slowly reached for the cereal and handed it to me. “Thanks.” And we parted without another word. As I walked down the aisle, it suddenly occurred to me: for a second or so, I wonder if that dude actually thought I might be 85! [Nah…]
Oh, wow. That reminds me of a time somebody fooled me—without meaning to. Do not, under ANY circumstances, ever utter these words: “When’s the baby due?” DON’T DO IT!
One time a couple of summers ago, in a parking lot, I (passenger) and someone from the next vehicle (driver) bumped backsides. I made the mistake of uttering those regrettable words, “Excuse me, Sir.” I shuddered as I looked at that dude’s feminine mouth growling the response: “…MA’AME!” I don’t even recall what I said, probably the wrong thing.
Yesterday my daughter was comparing the eating habits of our puppy and someone else’s dog. Unfortunately, the conversation got mixed up a bit, and I could not tell whether she was talking about animals or their owners. I could not help but smirk when Lily said, “She’s just a little chubby….”.
And, finally, I will share the one that just now happened: I came out of the bathroom and cheerfully sang, “I’m BA-A-ACK!” My daughter says, “That’s gross.” HAHA, she was talking about the picnic cooler in her hands. But the timing was perfect.