Venus, Pluto, & Mars

WOMAN: “I heard it’s a better deal to get the internet package.” GIRLFRIEND: “Oh!  Thanks; I’m so glad you told me!”TEENAGER:  “Seriously?  GozzleWeb, Duh!”

HUSBAND:  “Since when are you an expert on computers?”

WOMAN:  “Is that light switch going to work again after the project?” GIRLFRIEND:  “I couldn’t stand not having that light for two months.”TEENAGER:  “Slumber party!  Yess!”

HUSBAND:  “You turned on the wrong switch.”  [Shakes head.]

WOMAN:  “I’m sure you see that pedestrian.” GIRLFRIEND:  “Oh, I did see him; but thanks—I always appreciate the reminders, just in case.”TEENAGER:  “Momm…..!”

HUSBAND:  “Maybe you should just drive from now on.  How about THAT?!”

WOMAN:  “It’s really warm in here; can we turn the A/C on?” GIRLFRIEND:  “Girl, I feel your pain.  If I could, I’d adios my last layer.”TEENAGER:  “…”

HUSBAND:  “Are you kidding? It’s freezing in here. Just look at the thermostat.”

WOMAN:  “My mother mentioned it’s been awhile since we came over.” GIRLFRIEND:  “You’re so good about remembering your family.”TEENAGER:  “I hope she doesn’t make meat loaf again.”

HUSBAND:  “….”

WOMAN:  “Anybody want to do something Friday night?” GIRLFRIEND:  “I’d love to!  Where shall we go?  How about that new Indian place?”TEENAGER:  “Sure!  But can I get back to you later in the week?” [Translation: “…if I don’t get a better offer?”]

HUSBAND:  “I don’t know; I’ve been so tired this week.  Oh, go ahead and make plans.  I’ll go along with whatever.”

WOMAN:  “Is that actor the guy who played in “Revenge of the Dogface?” GIRLFRIEND:  “I don’t know.  I just saw that movie last week and don’t remember any of it.”TEENAGER:  “No, Mom.” [belly laughs] “You’re thinking of Alex Biddle.  He also played Shibe in ‘Titans of the Yon.’  This is Gray Tonskin.  I doubt you’ve seen any of his movies.  But I can see how you’d get them mixed up.”

HUSBAND:  “I guess we’re now in ‘talk mode.’ *#!@ Where’s the blasted Pause button?”

This entry was posted in AAA Laura's Favorites :), Life With Hubby, Relationships. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Venus, Pluto, & Mars

  1. Tamz says:

    Too funny!!!

  2. Tamz says:

    Woman: “Let’s watch the new Three Stooges movie.”
    Girlfriend: “It was hilarious, and I wasn’t even a fan, way back when.”
    Teenager: “No thanks.”
    Husband: “I’ll give it 10 minutes, but if it’s too slapstick, I’m done.”

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