Ten Ways to… Whatever.

 

You clicked today’s title, didn’t you, because… you had to see the list!  Yeah—lists are all the rage: “12 Simple Home Remedies” … “Eleven Ways to Avoid Housework” … “Top Ten Skateboarding Cities.”

In today’s fast-paced, tl;dr* world, our subconscious thinks bullet points are the most bang for the buck.  (My blog, in fact, has a ceiling on the word count.)  Yeah, Baby! Keep it brief; Cut to the chase; Fix me a rubber band sandwich, and make it snappy!

*Web lingo:  Too long; didn’t read

I have to admit, I’m a sucker for it.  Those lists are irresistible.  (How else could John Tesh keep us tuned in through four minutes of commercials?)

Case in point, this week I hovered over, and yes—clicked: “Ten Ways to Be Happier.”  I’m just glad I’m not a cat: curiosity would have killed me.

As usual, there were no surprises; an utter disappointment.  After only reading the first bullet, I nearly shut it down.  Consider this: If you were going to write down ten things that impact our happiness, would the first one on your list be “Make your bed”?    Srsly?*

*More Web lingo

Now, if they are suggesting you get into bed, they might have something—and bonus points if you add spouse.  That’s what I’m talkin’ about!  But Srsly: “Make your bed”?  What the heck?

The edifying use of my 3.4 minutes continued with suggestions like “Display sentimental items around your home.”  The rationale here included psycho-jargon about our cycle of enjoyment.  Mkay? What-EVERRR…

I must admit, there was one that was noteworthy: “Start a gratitude journal.”  I like that.  Let’s do it!  Even the description wasn’t half bad.  “Reflection is an important part of happiness, and pausing to reflect on a positive event from each day cultivates gratitude.”  For the record, that description wasn’t half good, either:  They forgot to mention the Awesome Object of our gratitude:   Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort (albeit giving a nod to spirituality down at Point No. 10).

So, yeah, I’ll keep clicking the links.  They’re fun.  And they’re quick reads—intended give us springboards for conversation in the coffee room—or, at the very least, fodder for a one-minute blog.

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